Where do I go now?

So where do I go?  I should explain…

The last time I upgraded, I plumped for the HTC Desire.  If I recall correctly, there wasn’t a huge amount of choice (feel free to flame me in the comments…) and it was the sister phone of the Nexus One, which was only available direct through Google.  A no brainer for a phone geek who wanted Android, and not an iPhone.

Now, I’m due an upgrade in March.  so what do I plump for this time?  What is going to tickle my smartphone fancy?  The Samsung Galaxy s2?  The Motorola RAZR? An LG? One of the new HTC’s?  Should I go for dual core or quad core?  What about the battery life on these behemoths?  A groovy screen that massages my eyeballs, screens that are so fast that they start moving just with the power of thought and thickness of an credit card that has some sort of eating disorder?  How long will the battery last?  As pretty as they, and other new models coming out soon to tempt me are, what’s the point of they don’t last long enough for a day?

And this thing will have to last almost two years.  What’s the point of a phone made out of fancy papier mache, as its so thin, I could possibly shine a torch through the casing and still light up a room?  I am relatively active, and I do venture outside occasionally, and as its England, it’s often raining or muddy.  Usually both.  Neither of which are great for a phones health.

So then I have to have a case.  Which adds bulk.  and stops me enjoying the aesthetics of a superphone, the tactile plstics, the kevlar weave (looking at you RAZR [wink]).  Then there is the trauma of which case to go for.  Thin?  Silicone?  Rubber?  Rigid plastic?  Strange designs on the case?

The gorgeous screens…  yes, they are bright.  They are clear.  They are so amazing with their SuperAmoled this, and their pixel density that, that I have no doubt they will cure me of my mild astigmatism overnight. But have you seen the size of the screens now?  Massive!  Huge!  Mahoosive!  How are my tiny hands supposed to use these phones while I’m using my spare hand to hold a drink/hold a cigarette/hold my sons hand/scratch myself inappropriately?  And if I want to make my battery last longer than, say, a fag break, I have to turn the brighness down.  Which I feel kind of defeats the point…

Oh and then the accessories issue.  Got an iPhone?  Then there is every accessory that you can possibly think of, and probably some that you can’t, so that you may indulge in pimping your phone to within an inch of its life.  Got an Android phone?  Good luck.  You can find gear online, but you are pretty restricted.

Lordy.  The OS prickly pear.  So… do I want Gingerbread? Or do I get ICS?  Do I want AOSP or am I happy to have a skin on there like Sense, Motoblur, Touchwiz or heaven forbid a phone from a network with so much crapware on it that that it struggles to even manage a text message.  Do I get a phone with a skin on the basis that some genius will eventually unlock it, S-Off it, defeat the bootloader, develop a custom ROM and make the kernel work well?

Then when I do manage to wade through that minefield and choose a phone, I do so in the knowledge that it will be out of date in a week and a half.  Samsung Nexus S anyone?

It’s a good job I’m a phone geek, and I can wade through all of that without losing the will to live and walk into a store and order an iPhone.  But I can see why other people do.